There is no hardship
or disappointment
when I don’t know what to expect ……………….. I had to learn that
when I admit that I don’t know …………………….. I had to accept that
when I feel that what I’ve told or am telling myself that I want, might not actually be what I really want . . . from myself . . . from you . . . from life . . . so . . .
. . . I had to practice letting go of wanting anything in particular and began to practice appreciating everything as a gift …….. I had to adjust to how unnatural that felt
When I am at peace with my not knowing what’s best for me, I’m far less likely to be confident in my knowing what’s best for you.
As it turns out, my best is to be discovered when and as I open up . . . (I cannot know what it is until I sincerely try) and as I open up with kindness, curiosity, and sincere honesty …………. attempting to express—not what I know—but what something seems like to me, again, kindly and honestly—tell another human being what I am actually feeling, what I am sensing or “picking up” on.
This is not to be imposing it upon you
But offering it to you, almost always after caringly listening and then asking you first, if you’d like to hear anything back . . . or did you just need me to listen? . . . (Both are equally valuable!!!) (I apologize to all of you who already know this) . . .
If, by chance, you do ask me for my input, if I begin with the words, “Well, you need to . . .” . . . tune me out . . . I’m speculating and thinking.
But if what I offer is simply how or what came to me while I was listening, on the odd circumstance wherein I might be helpful in some non-romantic but loving way . . . we might become better friends . . .
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