Perhaps Again

The genderlessness of love is the genuineness of love.

The colorfulness of love is the colorfulness of humanity.

The authentic path towards love will be found and followed in those who have come to peace with the uncertainty of all…within the constancy of love;

who have embraced the genuine moments of sincere ‘not-knowing’ of an outcome, as an opportunity to trust in that love, by daring to care…against whatever odds the mind or, perhaps, some others are forecasting…we still believe in love.

This is a trust that is beyond understanding…

this is a trust in your own broken brilliance—in your very own core goodness—which you had begun to doubt in yourself. You doubted your goodness, which you had tried many times to act upon, tried again and again, and couldn’t seem to get it right…

to be good enough…which we felt we could or would never be…which sucks…

which morphed into comparing and competing…which also suxs…but (as you can see by the spelling) it’s a different kind;

so, we figured that we could at least try to be better than someone else, in order to feel somewhat better about ourselves…

you see, when we cannot live up to our own impossibly high standards (or those battered into, I mean, taught to us in true hypocritical fashion (do as I say, not as I do), then we need to appear as blameless as possible by seeming to be ultra-good while distracting as many as possible from our painful and shameful truth of our own angry confusion at ourselves.

Here’s the thing though, what additional evidence or proof do you require of love?… other than how good we feel when we choose to be true to the love in us for the love of those we love…no matter what…love will bear the price of loving…

There is no cost-factoring analysis when honest love is honestly claimed.

When we choose to act caringly, not merely pretending to care, then we realize that we’re in a relationship that we are willing to keep working towards improving, to keep giving a hoot about, well, frankly, that realization is motivation, in and of itself, to lend good purpose and bring warm meaning to any day.

When and as we are leaning into the goodness within us to extend ourselves outwards 

To be unafraid as we continue to be willing to try.

Have you honestly forgotten that love isn’t something we need to earn?

Or that we have to deserve love as it shows us patience, generosity and kindness?

Or that loving equally means anything other than what it means? Equally equal.

Perhaps, we haven’t so much forgotten these truths about love, as it is,

perhaps, that we were never shown what to look for in ourselves.

Perhaps…I believe in you.